At Least I Can Eat

I finally made it home after my first ever hospital stay.  And my how things had changed in just a matter of months.  I went from being a perfectly healthy 14 year old, to a very sick one quickly.  My freshman year of high school started out seemingly normal.  Now my life would be forever changed.

Ulcerative Colitis-I have this diagnosis that I still don't really understand.  It's just nice to have a name to give my troubles.  Which, like I mentioned in the previous post, seemed to be resolved thanks to the handful of medications I was now taking (Asacol, 6-MP, prednisone, and maybe more but that's the ones that stand out from memory).  With all of these floating in my stomach, I needed to make sure to eat.  Of course with the prednisone, I had no problem eating.  But now my diet had to be changed due to the condition of my colon.

Now, I could at least eat which is tremendous progress and a relief compared to a few months ago.  There were foods to stay away from now and foods that were suitable for a person with Ulcerative Colitis as recommended by my gastroenterologist.  They recommended a low residue diet.  I also stayed away from dairy and acidic type foods.  And I steered clear of spicy foods.

As far as low residue-at this point in my life, I had yet to develop an appreciation for fresh fruits and vegetables.  I didn't really care about things that grew on trees or came from the ground.  The salads that I now eat almost daily, it didn't hurt my feelings that I couldn't eat those.  I wouldn't put lettuce or tomatoes on my hamburger.  I actually had corn (that had been cooked), but it was fresh from the garden.  Even with that, it didn't settle well.  It tasted great, but things ended poorly.  (Someone with a history of severe diarrhea doesn't need the aid of a high fiber diet.)

Then there are the whole wheat/whole grain products.  The "loss" of this was like how I felt about salads.  White bread, white rice, white pasta were my preferred choice.  Original Cheerios, I thought to be dull, and that's been the case until the past couple of years.

I essentially went on a lactose free diet.  My parents bought a milk called Sweet Acidophilus.  This is where my new diet would hit hard.  I was, and still am, a lover of milk.  And now I would have to drink this seemingly foreign concoction?  That first taste was terrible!  But come to find out, that first drink was what my mind told it to taste like.  The reality is that it tasted like regular milk.  How about that?

When I stayed away from foods with acidity, that broke my heart.  Spaghetti and pizza fit in this category.  We tried to make this work.  At least for spaghetti.  This was a wacky, desperate, and just plain wrong combination, but eating spaghetti plain is not good.  Spaghetti sauce would be too much for me to try and digest, and I was staying away from dairy, so Alfredo sauce was out.  I could eat ground beef so that was added, but of course the combo was still dry and bland.  Why not put ketchup on it?  Yes, I could eat ketchup, and yes, I tried it on it.  It wasn't dry at least.  And ketchup pairs well with ground beef.  Spaghetti noodles, not so much.  This was so sad and awful.  But like I said, I was desperate.

As far as pizza though, we didn't find a way to make that work that I remember.  Pizza just had to be deleted from my life.  The pizza sauce, the cheese, and possibly the sausage with its spices, I'm sure would have sent my intestines into overtime.  It was terrible.  I love(d) pizza!  What teenager (or human being) doesn't?  And it seemed to be the meal of choice for all events requiring food.  (Not really all of them, but it was the case for many and one too many for me.)  Again, sad and awful.

With no cheese in my diet and with my staying away from any potentially spicy foods, I resorted to eating hamburgers and french fries at Mexican restaurants.  They aren't known for those types of food either.  But who knows what kind of havoc those Mexican spices paired with cheese and lettuce and tomatoes and things would have wreaked on my diseased colon had I tried to eat a fajita or a taco salad or something.

Then there was ice cream.  Again, what teenager (or human being) doesn't like ice cream?  Although there may have been lactose-free versions of this available at the time, I can't recall trying any.

My family did their best to accommodate these new dietary restrictions buying foods suitable with the recommendations of my doctor.  And meal preparations had me in consideration, too. (like with the spaghetti).  If a spicier meal or just one that was harder for me to digest was being prepared, there would be a separate preparation for me (like with the spaghetti).

It was understandable why I needed to abide by these new dietary changes.  If I wanted to try and keep my symptoms under control, this was a good way to do it.  I didn't go hungry.  (Well, I did because the prednisone made me feel that way 24/7, but I wasn't malnourished.)  It was just very irritating.  Like being on a weight loss diet that says you can't eat this or that.  My problem is I didn't feel the leeway to give in to my temptations.  That could lead to a relapse.  I didn't want that.

It was isolating, a little humiliating to some degree.  I didn't (and still don't) like to be singled out.  And with my meals having to be different than those around me, it made it feel like the attention was on me.  That of course was never the intention.  Seeing others eating foods I loved brought on a lot of "why me?"